As most of you know I am generally a happy, positive, outgoing person. This mainly because I run. I used to be grumpy, negative, and an introvert. I am fixing to be really, really honest about my day and I hope you can forgive me. I need to get this out of me before it eats me alive.
My foot started hurting the first week of my taper for the Little Rock Marathon. I treated it kind and iced it a lot, but it still hurt on marathon day. I ran anyway. I know that was stupid, but I didn’t want to seem like a wuss. It hurts bad now. I haven’t ran since Sunday. I am going crazy.
I have always had low self esteem and running gave me something to be proud of. Running allows me to prove that I am strong. Running makes me feel better about myself. I need to run for my mental health. I have to run or I feel worthless. I know that is crazy. I know I do a lot of other things that prove my worth to the world, but running is my anti-depressant.
I have been riding the stationary bike at the gym for the last two days, but it isn’t the same. I am going through withdrawals. After I rode today, I skipped class today and slept for three hours. I never skip class.
My friends on Twitter have been tweeting about “going for a run” and that makes me insanely jealous and mad. Ugh. I don’t want to be angry at my running friends for doing what they love! I have never really been hurt bad enough that I could not physically run. I have always been able to push through the pain. Every painful step I take reminds me that I cannot run. I am going to try aqua jogging in the morning. Maybe that will help.
Sorry about the negative post. I feel better now. Thanks for listening.
Have you ever been sidelined with an injury? How did you cope? I am willing to try anything!